i am back!

hey hey... haha i am back after soo long... well haruna asked me to update so here it is... its not like i don have anything to write.. its jus that i got too much to write that i don know where to begin...

today haruna rosey and me went to east coast... well basically it was a totally emo outing after
rosey left..

i neve knew how much haruna and i had in common that for the first time i told her something that absolutely no one else in the worlds knows... i feel so much bette now...





sometimes your brain tells you one thing and you friggin feel something else... i know its kinda stupid but it jus cant be helped... i know its of no use feeling this way coz wads done is done.. wads ended is ended but that does not mean that i cant miss you.. and i am so totally missing you.. there is not one single day goes by without me thinking abt you... i know you don do the same.. not even the slightest thought of me would come by you.. but it does not matter.. i don know if you still do read my blog.. but if you do thanks...

friendship... i don know wads guys defination of this but i really give alot of respect to friendship.. i guess years are not enough to know a guy so well... one day they jus wake up and decide you screw up your day... jus basically screw you up more than you already are... i neve expected this from someone i put so close to my heart.. from someone who was treated with so much of respect in my house and to someone i put so high up in my life... well you seriously dont deserve any gal's friendship... thatz for sure!!!

on another note...i noticed something among the indian guys... there are a few frenz of mine guys of coz who sleep around with other gals and kinda like scandals while in a relationship says that it is alright as long as the gal does not find out (hopeless guys)... i don know in wad way do they think its alright... i mean its singapore for godsake... the gal is bound to find out someday... jus imagine if things does go smoothly without the gal finding out and it ends up in marriage, on the day of the wedding, from the gal's side her frenz arrive and take a look at the groom.. can you imagine she strats yelling " I SLEPT WITH HIM LAST MONTH!!!"... hahahaha... i would love to see such a thing... and than i have some frenz who jus plainly sleep around with gals... well cant really say anything abt that as long as they don do such a thing to nice gals... than there are some who say that the gal is the most beautiful person they have ever seen and bla bla when they are in the relationship and goes like oh my got she looks like a transexual and oh my god she is so ugly and bla bla when they have broken up... argghhh so wanna kill these kinda guys.. and than there are the lantai angels who still talk abt their ex galfren as if they are the most precious thing.. these are the kinda guys i am so proud to have as frenz..

as a gal i really cant stand when guys really put gals down.. like really talk badly abt them.. coz i have and am going through that and i find it so wrong... i mean why.. why should they do that.. wad have we ever done that is soooo wrong.. okie i know there are some gals who are real bitches.. thatz some... not all.. so FRIGGIN STOP GENERALISING AND STOP JUDGING!!!

recently i was talkin to this guy in msn.. the first time i talked to him.. so he was jus asking questions where and i studying and all.. than he asked me so am i seeing anyone and i jus replied no i am single but unavailable.. and gues wad he said.. "okie than bye coz i don like wasting my time"... WTF!!!!!! how irritating... and than the best part is that when i asked him why he is so rude he starts scolding me... he started calling me a skank and such jus becoz i said i am interested in a relationship.. wad the hell wad wrogn with him.. amazingly i was in a super good mood that day.. so i jus told him nicely "well, why don you try going to tamil matrimony. com as you are not lookin for frenz but a wife"... and than he starts using awful words and i jus blocked him off... no point talking to useless guys and trying to make them understand that they are too young to be in a relationship....

yesterday i had the most weirdest dreams.. well i wont say most weirdest coz i have had pretty wierd dreamz in my life.. but a very unexpected one... i dreant abt ismail... haha... i dreamt that we got into contact again and we started talking... you know like how we used to talk... no awkwardness and all... the feeling was really nice.. once i woke up i was feeling as if it was april 12th but that reality hit me and i was back to square one feeling all shitty.. which than led to the hole emo day out with haruna and rosey... i know i am supposed to get over it.. but i cant.. its jus a very unwilling reaction... its jus nice to think abt the good times.. before aug 12th when everything started... okie okie i wont talk abt that again... will jus start getting depressed all over again..

anyways my eyes are shutting... gonna hit the sack...

hope my entries will be regular from now on... hehehehehe


hugs and kisses... missing you badly....