FML

well something new jus came up.. i was chatting with the kaartik felle.. ismail's fren.. jus randomly i asked him if he was in the hospital the day we broke up.. you know coz ismail fainted and was brought to the hospital.. anyways i asked him if he remembers what went on there.. coz until now i am not very sure you see.. so i asked him if it was true that he wanted to beat me up and stuff.. the guy said not at all.. if he did want to, they would have def stopped him or given him a tight slap..

see now i dont know if he is saying that coz he is a fren but i have a gut feeling thatz not the case.. yes in these past yrs i have started trusting my gut feeling.. anyways wad if was sajeev told me all was a lie or exaggerated truth.. wad if ismail neve meant all those things.. wad if he did say all those things but day later realised how much he love me and miss me but sajeev neve came and told all this "good" parts.. becoz i remember sajeev asking me for a really weird and insulting things after all these drama.. after i rejected did we kinda stopped talking.. so what if wadever sajeev said was to drive me away from ismail.. 

i wonder i wonder.. my heart is beating so fast and i can feel like my face turning so hot.. my stomach hurts and damn i am back to square 1.. 

need a smoke!!! seriously!!!!